Dazed Gazer
parralex0889:

willyciraptor:

thesassylorax:

cygnettoswan:

4gifs:

Hippo doesn’t have time for this

Hippo got shit to do.

Hippo got swimming to do.

Hippo got shit to do and places to be

ain’t nobody fuck with hippo

parralex0889:

willyciraptor:

thesassylorax:

cygnettoswan:

4gifs:

Hippo doesn’t have time for this

Hippo got shit to do.

Hippo got swimming to do.

Hippo got shit to do and places to be

ain’t nobody fuck with hippo

Why do seals not like going out on the town?

big-bucking-baguette:

theeverglaringgaze:

big-bucking-baguette:

nononononononononononononononono

They don’t like to go clubbing.

they can still have a fun time without clubbing. like a cafe or some stuff like that

Why do seals not like going out on the town?

big-bucking-baguette:

nononononononononononononononono

They don’t like to go clubbing.

ishimarundo:

when people reblog two part posts in the wrong order

image

northlane:


#except for you #since you murdered most of them

oh my god the hashtags

leela-summers:

Let’s talk about sex - Tumblr Edition Part 1

Part 2: x

dekutree:

fencehopping:

Chameleon hatching

humans are fucking pathetic look at this little nigga come out of his egg on his own no crying no helpless “wah wah cut my umbilical cord” bullshit he come out and he already on the hunt for reptilian pussy no fear no games. and we’re the evolved species? smh

aphnorge:

mikulios:

figures are literally so useless like what am i supposed to do with them when i get old??? pass them down to my children as family heirlooms????

year 3000
"daddy, whats this?"
"ah, its our precious family heirloom. its been passed down for years. its sasuke uchiha."

sassy-brain:

I JUST FOUND COMEDIC GOLD ON A PORN WEBSITE OMFG

I WAS LOOKING UP PORN TO SHOW MY ROOMMATE WHO JAMES DEEN IS AND I FOUND A GUY WHO CALLS HIMSELF LIMERICK LARRY AND HE WRITES POEMS ABOUT THE PORN VIDEOS

I CAN’T BREATHE

cashcutie:

the story of a man and his unlikely friend

should i be using condoms or birth control to prevent pregnancy?
Anonymous

kingloptr:

fruitappreciation:

omg apparently artificial banana flavoring is based on the gros michel banana which was wiped out by a banana plague in the 50s and the banana we eat today is a totally different thing called the cavendish and thats why banana candy doesnt taste like bananas do you know how lied to i feel. like there was a fucking banana apocalypse and no one told me about it until now

image

hod-the-blind:

dx11:

mancermechro:

not sure why people don’t automatically say “shapeshifting” when asked what they want their superpower to be. you could become anyone you want. even fictional characters. anyone. cosplay would always be spot-on. dysphoria wouldn’t exist. perfection

rob a bank and disguise yourself as a stray pen lying on a shelf when the cops come

A pen with a shit ton of money lying next to it.

visenyatargaryyen:

laughtercues:

kingjohnkat:

redphonebox:

just so we’re clear, i use

dude

bro

man

gurl

babe

bby

loser

as gender-neutral and affectionate names

don’t forget son

What am I forgetting dad

image

You have forgotten who you are, and so forgotten me.